Goodbye
by confusedDIRTangel
Summary: Ororo has to deal with unrequitted love. Logan is there to comfort her. Rated for attempted suicide, profanity, and mild displays of affection.
1. The Main Event

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Goodbye by confusedDIRTangel a.k.a. Mari

Chapter 1- Ororo's P.O.V.

Why do I have to be in love with a man who will never love me in return? I retired early that night, feigning a headache. As I lay on my bed I turn my head to see what time it was…3:42 am. Everyone was asleep, including my beloved Wolverine.

The pain I am dealt because of my unrequited love is unbearable. I got into my bathroom and grab my emergency dagger off the ledge above the door. I turned to the corner to slip on my tennis shoes, not bothering with socks. I headed towards my balcony and opened one of my large French doors before stopping myself I quickly turned on a dime and went to where my desk was to retrieve my diary and my favorite fountain pen before retuning to the open door leading to my balcony.

As I stepped into the cool, January night air I called a gust of wind to me to carry me to the edge of the lake. I walked over to a large Weeping Willow and pushed aside some branches. I saw a tiny little alcove with perfectly arranged rocks. I settled myself against the trunk of the tree. I pulled the flashlight out form its resting spot, in the space between some rocks. I opened my diary to the page after my last entry, which was not too long ago.

"_Oh, my love. Please don't cry. I'll wash my bloody hands and we'll start a new life. I took off my disguise, just in time to hear you cry when you, you mourn the death of your bloody valentine. The night he died. You mourn the death of your bloody valentine, one last time. Sayin'…oh my love. Please don't cry. I'll wash my bloody hands and we'll start a new life. I don't know that much at all and I don't know wrong from right. All I know is that I love you tonight."_

I know nobody will be satisfied with the lyrics to a Good Charlotte song as my suicide letter.

_I know that you are wondering why on earth I am doing this, but if anyone would have just spent five minutes listening to me I wouldn't do this. The pain in my heart is unbearable form all the love I have that nobody is willing to return. Logan, I love you. I have loved you ever since Scott and I saved you and Marie in Canada all those years ago. All I wanted was for someone to love me, and I wanted that person to be Logan. I really do love him. I love him with my whole heart. _

"Sorry, I never told you, all I wanted to say. And now its too late to hold you. 'Cause you've flown away, so far away. Never, had I imagined living without your smile. And now its too late to tell you. 'Cause you've flown away, so far away. And I know your shining down on me form heaven. Like so many friends we've lost along the way. And I know eventually we'll be together, one sweet day. And I'll wait, patiently to see you in heaven."

I put down my diary and my pen. I reached over and picked up my dagger. I slowly withdrew it from its sheath of carved ivory. I watched in admiration as the artificial light from the flashlight play across the gleaming metal. I turned off the flashlight and took the dagger in a firm grip. I pulled up the hem of my Egyptian cotton nightgown up to the very tops of my thighs. I slowly brought the dagger tom my left knee cap and drew it down my leg slowly, to let the pain sink in. I applied more pressure the farther I cut down my leg. I paused when I reached the top of my thigh, taking time to ogle at the long, deep gash running down the top of my thigh; I was mesmerized by the large amount of blood oozing out of the open wound.

I made two more identical wounds on either side of the one I previously made; creating the appearance that my love, Logan, had done this to me with is adamantium claws. I did likewise to my right thigh also. My chocolate colored skin was now stained scarlet from my blood sliding over my skin. Having lost so much blood I was becoming light headed. I would be gone soon… But not soon enough.

I needed to leave before I had time to regret my decision. I thin made three parallel slices on my left forearm, and shortly after, likewise on my right. I was now satisfied that it would get the job done. I closed my eyes and let the blood gush out of my open wounds. Shortly after, I was slipping into unconsciousness.

END CHAPTER 1

A/N: please r/r and tell me what you think. The next chapter will be in logans pov. I need ideas as to what should happen.


	2. His Discovery

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Goodbye by confusedDIRTangel aka Mari

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A/N: Thanks to: Laura Petri, Ginger Lane, TigerStorm, TheWolf, and Daphne Lane for reviewing. Also they managed to save Jean at Alkali Lake.

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Chapter 2- Logan's P.O.V.

I woke up from my nightmare-ridden sleep when I felt somebody moving around in the room above me. I thought that it was just 'Ro tossin' around in her sleep…again. 'Ro has been havin' trouble sleepin' lately, so silly me thought nothing' of it. Almost immediately after I drifted to sleep, I had another nightmare about what Stryker did to me.

I woke up at about 4:30 am to go see if I could find any beer in the pantry. I yanked on a pair of sweatpants and strode out of the room with no shirt on. I crept quietly down the stairs and started rummaging' around for a beer, preferably Molson's. I didn't even find any so I just grabbed a root beer out of the fridge. All of a sudden the Wolverine in me told me to go take a walk. I opened the door to reveal the huge backyard behind the mansion. There was also an Olympic sized swimming pool and a huge lake. After I stepped outside I started shivering incessantly. I ignored it and just kept walkin' on.

I leisurely walked to the edge of the lake. I took several large gulps of my root beer when I reached the edge of the lake. Out of nowhere I faltered in mid-stride. I quickly dropped the root beer and sniffed the air again, just to make sure. I smelt, besides the usual, depression, tears, blood, death, and sandalwood. I knew that 'Ro was out here somewhere. She always smelled of sandalwood.

I started following the scents till I ended up circling one of the larger Wheeping Willow trees surrounding the lake. I hesitated slightly as I started to part the branches. I almost got sick at the sight that I saw right in front of me.

There was 'Ro, covered from her chest to her feet with her warm blood. I saw twelve long, deep cuts on her arms and legs. Three on each arm and leg. She lay with a dagger in her left hand… also covered in blood; her blood. I rushed forward to gently cradle her in my arms. I could feel her breathing against my chest. I could hear her heartbeat…so frail and slow. If I had come any later she would probably be gone.

I rose to my feet and sprinted back to the mansion, sending a telepathic message to Chuck, telling him to meet me in the med-lab in two minutes.

"Shit, 'Ro. What the hell were you thinking?" I muttered harshly to the beautiful woman covered in blood in my arms. When I reached the door that went into the kitchen I slowed down enough to let me kick the door down without dropping 'Ro. I wasn't expecting to kick the door hard enough to knock it off its hinges, but I did. I moved around the furniture with the stealth that only a cat could match. I didn't have the patience to wait for the elevator.

I leapt down the two flights of stairs three at a time. And I stopped quickly when I reached the doors to the med-lab doors. I turned around and pushed open the door with my back. I placed 'Ro down on one of the three examination tables and began to wipe off the blood on her skin with a wash cloth with warm water on it. When I was almost done, One-Eye, Jean, Marie, and Hank burst in trom the other end to the room, all prepared to help her.

" I was out for a drink and I found her under one of the trees by the lake with a dagger in her hand," I reported as they all set to work.

About an hour later, all of her wounds were bandaged and stitched up. I found myself wonderin' to 'that' tree to clean up the mess. I found something. A diary. I couldn't resist. I flipped to the last entry. Only to find myself staring at the elegant writing that I knew so well…not knowing it was her suicide letter.

"_Oh, my love. Please don't cry. I'll wash my bloody hands and we'll start a new life. I took off my disguise, just in time to hear you cry when you, you mourn the death of your bloody valentine. The night he died. You mourn the death of your bloody valentine, one last time. Sayin'…oh my love. Please don't cry. I'll wash my bloody hands and we'll start a new life. I don't know that much at all and I don't know wrong from right. All I know is that I love you tonight."_

_I know that you are wondering why on earth I am doing this, but if anyone would have just spent five minutes listening to me I wouldn't do this. The pain in my heart is unbearable form all the love I have that nobody is willing to return. Logan, I love you. I have loved you ever since Scott and I saved you and Marie in Canada all those years ago. All I wanted was for someone to love me, and I wanted that person to be Logan. I really do love him. I love him with my whole heart. _

"Sorry, I never told you, all I wanted to say. And now it's too late to hold you. 'Cause you've flown away, so far away. Never, had I imagined living without your smile. And now it's too late to tell you. 'Cause you've flown away, so far away. And I know your shining down on me form heaven. Like so many friends we've lost along the way. And I know eventually we'll be together, one sweet day. And I'll wait, patiently to see you in heaven."

"I don't believe this. This can't be true. It can't be…" I kept whispering as I continued to reread her letter…again and again. "I have loved her for years, thinking that she would never want me," I whispered to myself as I felt a pang of guilt. "And it turns out that she loved me. Ironic, huh?" there I go again. Having conversations with yourself is not a good thing. I tried to convince myself that 'Ro does not love me, but it was not possible. Why else would she have tried to kill herself? Not only that, on her thighs and arms were three parallel cuts…She meant that I had done that to her. In some ways I did, by not telling her how I felt, no, feel.

I carefully closed her diary and took it and started walking gravely back to the mansion. I was surprised to find tears filling up my eyes, clouding my vision. I was not going to show this to anyone else. She knew that I would find it. Damn, I knew that woman, no, Goddess, was smart.

A/N: Please review and tell me what you think. I am also welcoming any suggestions you might have. I am trying to post a new chapter every other day. Keep reviewing. I love you all. Oh, and the next chapter will be Logan's pov. I didn't want this chapter to be too long.


	3. Feelings Revealed

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Goodbye by confusedDIRTangel aka Mari

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A/N: This is basically a continuation of chapter two. I did not want the chapter to be too long. And again, thanks to everyone who reviewed.

*blah blah*=telepathic messages.

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Chapter 3- Logan's P.O.V.

I walked in a daze towards the med-lab, only to see my beautiful African goddess with bandages covering her thighs and forearms. I pulled a chair up beside her and sat down, resting my elbows on the edge of the hospital bed. I looked at her, her beautiful white hair now tinged red with blood…her blood. I felt tears gathering in my eyes. I willed them not to come, but my triumph was short-lived. I felt a tear trickle down my cheek. I closed my eyes and held my head in between my hands and allowed the tears to fall freely.

I took a deep breath in an attempt to help slow down my erratic breathing. It didn't work. I continued to sob into my hands, but I was not making a sound. I felt a hand gently running through my unruly black hair. I already know who was treating me as if I was made of glass. I shivered slightly as my beautiful weather witch massaged my scalp with the pads of her fingers. I didn't want her to stop. I let her continue. I felt my breath catch in my throat as her slim hand slid down the side of my face to apply gentle pressure to the underside of my chin, forcing me to look at her face.

As I lifted my head, the look on her face was so affectionate and loving, despite what she attempted to do only a few hours ago. "Logan…" it was a plea for me to gaze into her eyes. Don't get me wrong, I love gazing into those deep pools of emotion. I was just afraid about what I would find. I looked up into her eyes. What I saw scared me…Love. Pain. Trust. Regret. Anger. Faith. Pity. Bewilderment. It was an odd combination.

"Shhh….Darlin'. You don't have enough energy to talk," I said, my voice heavy with emotion. "You, you lost a lot of blood. You probably won't be better for a few weeks. But I promise you that I will be here the whole time. Helping you get through this." I brought her hand to my lips and placed a tender kiss on the top of her hand. I suddenly remembered that I had her diary which contained her suicide letter. I took it out from the crook of my arm and gave it to her. She looked at me with sympathetic eyes.

"Is this true?" 

She nodded her head.

"All of it?"

She nodded her head, again.

"'Ro, there is something I have to tell you that I ha…" I was cut off when Jean entered the med-lab carrying a food tray containing two bowls of soup, two glasses of milk, and two pieces of chocolate cake, for a sugar boost I suppose.

"Oh, I'm sorry," the tall telepath stated, looking questionably between Ororo, the diary, and myself. "Am I interrupting something?"

"No, that's okay. I was actually just about to ask somebody to bring us some food."

*Logan, I am sorry that you had to see Ororo like this. As you know she is normally in control. I don't know what caused her to try and commit suicide. Do you?*

*Actually, I have an idea but I was just about to talk to 'Ro about it and see if I can get details out of her, no thanks to you.*

Jean walked over and handed my the food tray which I placed on the table next to me. "I'll be back in a few hours to change her bandages." Having said that, Jean left the room. I picked up one of the soup bowls and began to blow in it gently to cool it down. Once I was satisfied with the temperature I brought a spoonful to 'Ro's lips. She sipped cautiously. A few spoonfuls later she was opening her mouth for the spoon.

Soon after, we were working on the chocolate cake. I went to give her the first bite. To my surprise, instead of opening her mouth to accept the food she started talking to me. "Thank you, for finding me," she said as she placed her hand on my outstretched arm. Gently rubbing it, causing a blush to creep into my cheeks.

"It was nothing 'Ro. Nothing at all," I said. Slightly embarrassed by her constant gaze.

"No, Logan. If you didn't find me I," she choked on her words as tears started coming down her cheeks. I reached my free hand out to gently wipe away the tears. I wasn't very successful. I placed the cake back on the tray and rose out of my chair to sit on her bed next to her. I leaned forward and wrapped my arms around her waist. I heard her sigh in contentment as she wrapped her arms around my neck. "If you didn't find me I would be dead," she whispered into my ear.

PLEASE REVIEW!!!!^_^


	4. Contemplation

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Goodbye by confusedDIRTangel aka Mari

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A/N: Hey I am kind of running out of ideas. I am open to all suggestions. Thanks to everyone who reviewed.

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Chapter 4- Ororo's P.O.V.

I sat there in his arms for, Goddess, who knows long. I wept into his muscular chest. His arms wrapped around my waist, holding me against him. I didn't like him seeing me in such a vulnerable state. I turned my head so it was resting in the crook of his neck. "I love you, Logan. I love you," I whispered as I continued to sob into his neck. I felt a hand come up and lift my head up so I could look into his dark eyes.

Goddess, I remember the first time I looked into those dark hazel eyes of his. Charles had just called us into his office so he could formally introduce us to Logan….Wolverine. The first time we made eye contact I almost gasped. I have never seen such beautiful eyes. They were a deep forest green with flecks of gold in between. I knew right then that he was not only the man I am in love with, but also my soul mate. How I managed to live my whole life without him, I will never know.

I stared into his eyes, slightly confused. He leaned down and gently placed his lips on mine. He pulled away to look at me, as if to see my reaction. I loved the feel of his lips on mine. But the kiss was unlike one I expected. I thought it would be rough and demanding. It was surprisingly soft and promising. I was still in his arms waiting for him to kiss me again and after several moments without the closeness I was anticipating, I opened my eyes to see him with a look of bamboozlement (A/N: bamboozlement- a state of confusion or bewilderment) on his face.

"Wh-what is wrong-g?" I managed to stutter, for my breathing had become inexplicably erratic. He just sat there, continuing to look at me. His hand started to make circular motions on my shoulders as he just sat and gazed at me. How I wanted him to tell me that he loves me. But once again I find myself being foolish. He loves Jean, not me. He never even really looks at me. Sure, he makes the occasional comment on how my hair looks or how my shirts fit me nice, but that is what friends do.

"Look, 'Ro. I should've told ya this a long time ago but I just couldn't find the right words to say," whispered Logan. I looked at him, slightly confused, wondering what he could possibly be thinking. Then to my complete surprise, he starts to sing:

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Baby, I've been around here

A little more than I should. 

We both know I got somewhere else to go.

But I've got something to tell you

That I never thought I would

But I believe you really ought to know

I love you

I honestly love you

I'm not trying to make you feel uncomfortable

I'm not trying to make you anything at all

But this feeling doesn't come along everyday

And you shouldn't miss the chance

When you get the chance to say

I love you 

I love you

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I honestly love you.

And if we both were born

In another place in time

This moment might be ending with a kiss

But there you are with yours

And here I am with mine 

So I guess I'll just be leaving it at this

I love you

I honestly love you

I honestly love you

At the end of his little performance he blushed something awful, as if flames were engulfing him on the inside.

A/N: Hey, I am sorry that I have not updated in a while but I have been really busy lately. I went to New York for a week. I saw 'Aida', skated in Rockefeller Center, saw 'The Boy From Oz' starring Hugh Jackman, met Hugh Jackman, got Hugh Jackman's autograph, performed in Carnegie Hall, was on the Today Show and while I was on the Today Show, I got semi interviewed by Willard Scott. Well, I hope you like the chapter.


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